Andrew Shaffer

Name: ____________

My ideal man is:
a. Smart
b. Funny
c. Good looking
d. Wealthy
e. Sociopathic
f. All of the above

I feel sexiest when I'm wearing:
a. New shoes
b. A slinky black dress
c. Nipple clamps
d. All of the above

I'm being afraid of:
a. Being flogged
b. Being tied up
c. Running out of toilet paper in a public restroom
d. None of the above

My favorite body part is:
a. My butt
b. My boobs
c. My eyes
d. My partner's eyes

Toys I would like to include:
a. Vibrators
b. Butt plugs
c. Hello Kitty-brand toasters
d. All of the above

I am:
a. Team Edward
b. Team Jacob
c. Team Edward does Jacob

I find it really hot when a man:
a. Listens to me
b. Cooks dinner for me
c. Canes my ass like a Singapore prison warden

[...]

In a relationship, I prefer to be:
a. Submissive
b. Dominant
c. Awake

One day, I'd really like to:
a. Meet Tom Cruise
b. Go skydiving
c. Have sex with Earl Grey
d. All of the above, at the same time

The amount of pain I can tolerate on a scale of 1 to 5, where 1 is "none" and 5 is "listening to anything by Fergie or the Black-Eyed Peas," is:
1-2-3-4-5