Deborah Feldman

All my aunts and uncles are hard on their children,it seems to me. They berate them, embarrass them, and yell at them. This is chinuch, child rearing according to the Torah.
It is the parents' spiritual responsibility that their children grow up to be God-fearing, law-abiding Jews.
Therefore, any form of discipline is all right as long as it is for that purpose.
Real anger is forbidden, but one must fake it for the sake of chinuch.
In this family, we do not hug and kiss. We do not compliment each other.